Tonight I went to see Sweeney Todd, starring Johnny Depp, with my friend Laura from church. We braved the mingingness of the Sutton UCI (well, actually now its Sutton Empire or some crap like that) over the mingingness of Croydon Vue cinemas at Purley Way. Every time I've been to the Croydon cinema I've had to wade my way through various bits of litter, rubbish and so on, make sure I find a seat that actually has a seat cushion (and that actually stays on the seat) then endure the noisiness and immaturity of the audience (who are usually teenagers of a certain ilk, you know the type I mean, the ones who aren't really there to watch the movie but who are there to create havoc). I would love to say that Sutton Empire was much much MUCH better than that - but unfortunately I can't. The seats, whilst they are on a graded incline, have obviously been designed by a giraffe, as I was flat out seeing over the seat back of the person in front of me. Couple this with then trying to see over his head, and well... was I at 'Mission Impossible'?
The cushions had become detached from the seats, so you spent much of your time balanced on one buttock, craning your neck to see the screen. Heaven help you if you are startled during a particularly scary bit, you'll fall fair off your chair! Actually that did happen to me when Sweeney Todd slashed his first victim's throat, I jumped from the shock, and having unfortunately chosen that exact moment to have a sip from my drink the bloke in front was nearly wearing my diet coke! I then performed a wierd sort of trapeze artist maneouvre and managed to regain my balance on the other buttock, but the experience left me slightly shaken. Luckily I am actually very adept at balancing myself precariously on one buttock. I don't know why but I suspect it has something to do with my netball playing days, when during one particular nailbiter with our team Nafai (No Ability, F@*% All Interest) - or maybe it was with the Pumbas, I can't remember - but anyway, I developed cramps in not one but both buttocks simultaneously, and had to be half dragged off the court (as no-one could actually carry me - this was in my more heavy days). Since then I have been doing regular butt-clenching exercises to strengthen that muscle, and I now have buns of steel (well, I wish... but 'picking up a button' doesn't really cut it...for those ladies who are familiar with THAT type of exercise! ).
The good thing about this cinema though was that we didn't have the "Croydon Hoodies" with us, so it meant that we actually got to watch the film. I have to say, I actually enjoyed this film (well as much as one can 'enjoy' a Jack the Ripper style serial killing blood-fest). The best bit about this movie was the music by Stephen Sondheim. That man is pure genius when it comes to intensely emotional and gloriously soaring melodies, coupled with extremely witty lyrics and an artist's palette of orchestral colour and texture. His melodies don't follow the norm at all, you can't second guess at all where they're going, as he goes through wondrously unusual chord progressions, but when he gets there, it all makes perfect sense. Truly my favourite pieces would have to have been "The Worst Pies In London", "Johanna" and "Pirelli's Miracle Exilir". I left the cinema and immediately had to buy the soundtrack on iTunes, it was so good (although I now have to blog about the perils of iTunes because hey, I paid for the music - why can't I use it in the format I need, and why can't I copy it to other devices (like my Zen - does the whole world have to own an iPod?) - but that's for another time).
I've read some reviews about Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter, and I have to say, I thought their singing was just magnificent. Exactly the right sort of accent, tone and character for the individual pieces. I thought they were brilliant. And Alan Rickman, with his dry, wry tone, exactly what was required, was just fabulous...
So I attach for you the trailer...
Anyway, if you haven't seen it, please do, you won't regret it. Just don't eat a meat pie beforehand...
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